People always speak on the importance of “being real” and to be honest, that concept is vague and depending on who you speak with, has many different definitions. I’ve been raised on two things that are the foundation of who I am: keeping my word and speaking my truth. The first, I’ve never had too many personal issues with but the latter, that is a completely different story. Keeping my word was simple to grasp because you say what you mean and mean what you say. I want people to be able to trust my word and know that they can depend on it. I don’t tolerate anything less from those around me so I’m going to give them that same respect. Let me get back to the overall message before I go off about grown men not keeping their word…Both concepts come down to one core factor that until recently, I didn’t recognize which is, the power of the truth teller.
I’ll definitely get back to my personal experiences but first I want to speak on a truth that a good friend of mine recently shared. I spoke with her before writing this post because it isn’t my truth to speak on. She has a condition called MRKH, which is characterized by the absence of a functioning uterus. She has known about the condition since she was 15 years old but she just recently got the courage to speak on it publicly. I spoke with her privately about how proud I was and how much love I was constantly speaking into her life. I wasn’t proud of her for telling everyone but rather of releasing that burden on her spirit. One of my mentors always tells me, “Just because it’s the truth, doesn’t mean it’s the right time to speak on it.”
That statement can refer to your own truth or expressing a truth to someone else. As I previously stated, speaking my truth has been something that I progressively work on. I have my own emotional damage that I have dealt with that caused me to silence myself. When someone tends to make you feel that your voice doesn’t matter, over time you start to believe it yourself. Once I dealt with that past trauma, I realized that I was a child again and just spoke on every thought that ran across my mind.
As he beautifully stated, “Being truthful is not the same thing as being careless.” Your words have an immense amount of power whether you understand it or not. Just think about how much of our youth have taken their own lives due to the words of others OR the biases and stereotypes that have been instilled in us from the words of the generation before us. The Power of the Truth Teller is a responsibility. Your words have an impact on every aspect of your life whether personal or professional.
More often than not, people use the truth as a weapon rather than giving truth with love OR the truth is told when it’s most convenient for the speaker rather than understanding when it’s the right time for the listener to accept what is being said. While we have a responsibility to show up respectfully with the truth ourselves, we also have that same responsibility to take a step back from individuals in our life that choose not to do the same. It took me years to not feel guilty for dismissing people from my life but at the end of the day, my emotional and spiritual well being MATTERS. Can you say you are actively making it a priority? If not, take a step back and put yourself first.